Chiff and Fipple Forums

Bloomfield wrote:I remember Ralph.

I first heard about Ralph from the elves. They had mixed feeling about Ralph at first. He was a stranger, and the elves had not yet seen his sterling character. But mixed feelings quickly turned into mixed drinks, and spirits in Jerry's night-workshop rose. Ralph soon became a valued member of the night-time activities, although Ralph had taken the Pledge and never touched a drop.

Perhaps it is true that opposites attract. In the company of Ralph, the elves (and Jerry) achieved some of their most celebrated tweaking successes. It was during Ralph's time that Jerrytones saw a major production boost, and it was Ralph who helped Jerry get a discount on laminate. It was Ralph who felt that peanut-butter-flavored fipple plugs would be a great idea---a project that sadly he could not see through to completion. Again it was Ralph who suggested the oblique angle on the tetrahedric reverberator insert for the Shaw tweaks. In his quiet, and unassuming, almost mousy manner, Ralph supplied useful and constructive input. He complemented the elves and their efficient and clean execution of tweaks with a spark of creative genius.

Ralph's life was not without grief, as all earthly existance is shot through with sadness. The threads of irrascibility that could be found among the woof and wrap of his productive life were evident to those who knew him well. But those mere threads were not the source of their grief: It was the fact that Ralph's nature was often misunderstood that caused his friends and family grief. I myself almost called him a rat once, causing perhaps the gravest moment of hardship---the moment of truth in the desert----when, like a man, Ralph remained firm and refused the consoling libation offered him by the sympathetic elves. It hurt him to be seen as greedy and extortionist, although Ralph himself, in lighter moments, would be the first to joke about his love for sunflower seeds.

That's how we will remember him: The joy and glee, the unbounded natural energy and resourcefulness, the delighted nibbling at the seeds: life, hope, and accomplishement.

We all remember Ralph.